Don't Forget the Gift Basket!

    Hi there! So, you're a new resident of Me-topia? Well, welcome! I have some good news and some bad news.  Good news first: Me-topia is AWESOME! It is the BEST place to live in the WHOLE WORLD, hands down! The bad news? Well... we're in a bit of a financial pickle.  But not to worry! The government of Me-topia (it's all very complicated, so don't try to understand it - just trust it!) has developed a fail-proof plan to fix everything for everyone! It was actually pretty easy. We all sat down one day and really tackled the problem, really got down to brass tacks.  We took the problem to its most fundamental level to come up with an amazingly responsible fiscal solution:

     "What exactly is the problem here?"

    "Well, sir, people are saying they can't afford things anymore and that their investments are losing value."

    "Really? That's it? They just don't have enough money?"

    "Uh... well, yes sir, I suppose that's basically it."

    "Well that's easy!"

    And it was! So here's the deceptively simple genius: I'm just going to give you some money.  I know! Isn't it great? How much do you want? A million me-dollars? You got it! Yeah, I just gave it to you.  It's yours now.  Once we realized that moving money around was as easy as changing some numbers from low ones to higher ones, the solution became pretty evident. Ah, the glories of this technological age! What? Oh, we don't physically HAVE the money. But that's a good thing! I mean, can you imagine carrying around a million me-bucks to give everyone? Ha ha! For laughing.  No, we just give some electrons a meaningful nudge and presto! Instant wealth.  It works because we SAY it works.  That's right, everyone in Me-topia is trading on the value of our word!

    So, welcome again! You should be all set with your million me-dollars.  Yeah, it IS a lot!  The only problem you might encounter is that everything now costs a million and one me-dollars.  We're still working on that one, but we'll probably just take control of everything anyway, so it'll work out.  Mostly.

    ...Probably.

--The Management

We're still working on the exchange rates for Schrutebucks and Stanley Nickels.