Ramblin' Man

Last night, lying awake in my hotel room bed, I thought long and hard about where I was and where I had come from. While this isn't my first attempt to find a sailing job - in fact, it's my second - it's the first time I've stricken out totally on my own. Even when visiting the hall in New York, I still returned daily to a building full of familiar faces and good company. It goes without saying that I'm constantly buoyed by the support from family, friends and faith, but here I am in a strange city, living on my own earned income and making plans to leave the 'rents. Peers are getting married, housed and otherwise settled... What madness!

One of the long, meaningful conversations I had last night was on this very topic: life transitions. The really important stuff comes and goes so quickly, we're often surprised that what's left after the hype is a gigantic paradigm shift. This is often expressed in disappointed tones like, "But I don't even feel like a [new title]!" Some of you may not feel like you've been working in your field for half a decade (or more); some may not feel like college seniors. It goes down the line in just the fashion you'd expect. Sometimes, I still don't feel much like a licensed engineer, but this new and exciting foray into independence is most certainly a step in that direction. I guess what it boils down to is being comfortable in your own skin. You get used to being a pumpkin, then BAMF! You're magically turned into a carriage. Or a stallion. Or a footman. Or a real, honest-to-goodness adult. I'm sure we can all think of about a million more metaphors for growing up, each of a differing degree of stretching-it-ness. And I do apologize if these are all epiphanies you came to a long time ago, but it's my new blog and this is killer material.

For those who are curious, the job hunt itself is on a brief hold while my shipping card is mailed from New York, from whence I neglected to check out. Oops.

On the horizon: The Search Commences -=- My Secret Music -=- On Living in Two Worlds

Draco

"And thou, Melkor, shall see that no theme may be played that hath not its uttermost source in me, nor can any alter the music in my despite. For he that attempteth this shall prove but mine instrument in the devising of things more wonderful, which he himself hath not imagined."
--Eru addresses the Ainur, Tolkien's The Silmarillion